Tag: depression

Reconciling the Good and the Hard, Part 1

When a loved one of mine got married, they shared with me a lot about the struggles they were experiencing in the transition. Most of them were normal growing pains that I had either gone through myself in my own transition to marriage, or heard others mention concerning their own, but some struggles were challenges unique to them and their situation. Many of them were difficult, even exceptionally so, but a month after their wedding day my friend said something that has stuck with me ever since. 

“Our marriage is really hard,” she said, “but bad and hard are not the same thing. Our marriage is hard, but it is also good, and that’s okay.”

Her statement pretty much sums up how I feel about 2020. It was hard. Like many others, I experienced far greater loneliness and isolation than ever before in my life. During our first three months of pandemic lockdown, I finally understood what King David meant when he said, “darkness is my closest friend”. Weeping became a regular part of my daily ritual. All of the melodies I found singing or playing instruments seemed to be sad ones. It was all I could do to eat the same things, walk the same routes, and write, as I was finishing a master’s degree at the time. Anything else felt far too monumental even to attempt.

Even so, oh, the Lord was so kind to me all that time. He drew me to prayer, brought me to much-needed truth in his word, and after several weeks, even brought my heart to rejoicing in the very midst of the trial. It’s not that the sadness went away, but the Lord, ever so gently, opened my eyes to the fact that it was my own selfish anger and bitterness about my situation that had driven me to the greatest depths of my despair. That April evening, he called me to repentance during a phone conversation with my, at the time, fiancé. I nearly felt betrayed by the words coming out of my mouth when the Lord finally caused me to submit to the sovereign plan he had decreed for that period in my life. 

The relief that flooded me immediately after was utterly unexpected. All the weeks before I had been fighting for all I was worth, stubbornly insisting that life MUST be different than it was, believing that I could somehow change my circumstances by pure will power, but I couldn’t. As I failed day in and day out to alter the things that felt SO UNFAIR, I grew more and more despondent. It wasn’t until that moment of submission that anything changed. I felt like I was giving in. I felt like I was losing some battle I had been determined to win, but the peace that washed over me those seconds after I spoke was not the feeling of a defeated warrior. It was the feeling of a rebellious child who had finally come back to her loving father in obedience. Those weeks were hard, some of the hardest I have ever experienced, but in some ways, they were good, if for no other reason than the one who carried me through them was the good shepherd himself.

Those weeks were characterized by several other traumas that I will not detail here, but I am grateful to say they did not last much longer past spring. After a change in housing, I spent a truly blissful summer in the Irish countryside, graced daily by food, family, work, and constant music. There was not one, but two pianos in the house where I stayed those six wonderful weeks. It was there that I began to heal from the physical and mental traumas of the springtime, and, I’m happy to say, started prepping in earnest for my upcoming wedding. 

To be continued in part II.

How Can Music Therapy Help Those with PTSD?

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a psychological condition that results from long-lasting symptoms associated with a traumatic event. These symptoms may include anxiety, irritability, flashbacks, intrusive and unwanted thoughts, paranoia, night terrors or other problems with sleep, physical pain, nausea, shaking, or sweating, emotional numbing, and avoidance of possible triggers. Untreated PTSD can make daily functioning difficult or impossible for those affected by it. While medication may be helpful, it can be associated with negative side-effects. Music therapy is one treatment option that may be beneficial in addition to or in stead of chemical interventions.

 

The modern music therapy profession was born in the early to mid-1900’s as musicians began serving veterans suffering from the lingering trauma of war. Music therapists continue to serve in that capacity, catering not only to the needs of veterans, but also to victims of abuse, violent crimes, accidents, natural disasters, or any other event that has resulted in chronic mental distress. Here are a few ways music therapy may help those with PTSD.

 

Expressing Emotion 

 

As with other therapies, a music therapy session is a safe place for clients to express whatever thoughts or feelings that they need to. Music therapy is unique to some other types of treatment, however, in that the client can express these things both verbally, through speech or song, and non-verbally, through instrumental improvisation or music listening. Sometimes words are hard to find, and in music therapy, that’s A-okay.

 

Developing Coping Methods

 

A music therapy session will likely only be once or twice a week, so it may be important for the client and therapist to identify and work on some strategies to ease symptoms and improve functioning during the rest of the week. This may include breathing techniques, selecting music to sing or listen to at difficult moments, music-lead meditation, or prompts for music making or song writing at home.

 

Promoting Community 

 

Some studies demonstrate that people with PTSD can benefit from being part of a music therapy group. This may involve musical improvisations, singing, group story-telling or song writing that focusses on sharing and working through the experiences of group members. Since PTSD can involve social withdrawal or feelings of isolation, group music therapy may be an effective and unthreatening way to connect with others.

 

If you think you or someone you know could benefit from music therapy, feel free to get in touch by emailing:

Contact.OpportunityUnleashed@gmail.com 

or sending a message through our facebook page..Learn more about PTSD here, or find out more about how music therapy can help those with PTSD here.